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Sissy Goff and David Thomas, Capable: How to Teach Your Kids the Strengths, Skills, and Strategies to Build Resilience (Bethany House, 2026)
In Capable, family therapists Sissy Goff and David Thomas observe the trend of today’s kids self-diagnosing their mental health status and rooting their identities in that. “I’m sad” has been replaced by “I’m depressed.” Rather than say they are “worried,” children now “have anxiety.” Instead of recognizing the normal human emotions they are experiencing, they stitch those emotions to their very identity, as though it were immovable and decided.
While children may feel incapable, Goff and Thomas found that parents are suffering too, often feeling like they don’t fully know their own children and are lacking confidence because of that. My own teacher and therapist friends have said that when kids are struggling, it quickly becomes apparent that the parents are often the ones who need help. Portions of this book reflect that reality. I appreciated that the book is written compassionately—not telling parents they’re doing it all wrong but rather reassuring them that they can trust their instincts as parents.
Depending on each parent’s background, fears and overcorrections can swing between neglectful and overreaching parenting, but the hope is to find a moderate approach. Each generation compensates for what they missed, and the pendulum often swings to the other side. The authors encourage parents to stop fearing theoretical pitfalls—based on their own childhoods—and instead see what the actual child before them needs. At times, Capable seems to be pleading with culture to let the kids learn the hard things they need to learn.
Goff and Thomas offer practical wisdom here for parents on when to step in, when to coach, and when to step back. They give “3 C’s” to develop in children: coping, competence, and challenges. Their model mirrors a phrase my husband and I have said in our own home filled with teens: “We need to allow them the dignity of working through a struggle.” The goal isn’t to remove obstacles but to use them as opportunities to overcome adversity and build skills. I also appreciated the authors speaking separately about the different developmental and cultural challenges boys and girls face when learning to become capable. It points again to the fact that parenting should be customized, not standardized.
Capable is very focused on developmental psychology, not theology, as it was written by Christian therapists rather than theologians. But the practical methods in here are incredibly helpful, and I wish I would have had this book years ago.
Emily Hunter McGowin, Households of Faith: Practicing Family in the Kingdom of God (InterVarsity Press, 2025)
In Households of Faith, Emily Hunter McGowin explores a holistic view of family based on the kingdom of God. I originally expected something more devotional, but I found that McGowin’s theologically academic approach challenged me to dig deep into the critical-thinking side of not just parenting but the concept of family. It had me reaching often for my Bible. While I don’t fully share the author’s egalitarian perspective, I immensely enjoyed engaging with several texts that were outside of the normal proof texts we often turn into blueprints for family formation.
The author breaks away from post–World War II, middle-class, white definitions of family life and instead dives into other cultures, countries, and times. As my family has a missions background, I appreciated a book that decentered the American perspective of family order as the only Christian perspective. Any truly biblical model would have to be applicable to those who follow God in any culture. However, I wouldn’t say McGowin successfully sheds all lenses and cultural biases. The book becomes political several times, and perhaps it says more about me than the author, but I’m just weary of politics being everywhere. I found these digressions distracting from her overall message.
Households of Faith is far more successful when it’s grappling with hard teachings about family from Jesus—such as how following Jesus will often produce strife in families, rather than the flourishing we may hope to secure. This was especially challenging, as books about family are often laced with promises for prosperity. Instead, McGowin reminds readers that it is not only normal but promised that Christians will struggle in this life. She points to the centrality of God’s kingdom and God’s family over creating our own little kingdoms.
The book also goes into detail on the multifaceted nature of sin and its effect on families. It’s refreshing to hear an author directly call out sin as sin, so much so that I cheered at this part. Sin isn’t something that is just “out there” but something families must deal with internally. Later, there is also a great discussion on what the sacraments of baptism and the Lord’s Supper can tell us about family life and how we relate to God and each other.
Despite my political and theological differences with the author, Households of Faith challenged and sharpened me in many ways. Many of its interesting and fresh observations regarding the family of God—the church—will have readers thinking for a long time.
Scott Keith, Being Family: Passing Down the Faith through the Generations (1517 Publishing, 2026)
Conservative parenting is often linked with an emphasis on obedience and authority. Being Family by Scott Keith, however, is focused on the vocation of family—a theological concept oriented around Christian freedom and serving your neighbor. The Bible doesn’t give us power dynamics as much as it gives us submission dynamics; we are each taught how to serve. That’s the idea behind vocation: serving in freedom.
Keith notes that Christians are free to marry or not marry—have children or not have children—but make no mistake: God still calls marriage and children good things. Families are good, and many of us are called to that vocation. The question is, what are the good works God has prepared each of us to do in the context of family? In other words: What is a family for?
Although God made both male and female, the ideas of gender roles in this book have less to do with cultural narratives and more with serving with whatever capacity God has given each person to serve. God has gifted us differently, but at the same time, there is no job too humble when it comes to the vocation of family. (Martin Luther himself talked about fathers changing diapers as an honorable vocation!)
Chapter by chapter, Keith goes through the freedoms and opportunities available to fathers, mothers, and even grandfathers and grandmothers. It’s conversational in tone, though the author does throw some Lutheran-specific lingo around. And for those interested in exploring these issues within a small group context, the reflection questions at the end of each chapter are excellent. I ultimately found Being Family’s reframing of service through vocation both freeing and inspiring.
Gretchen Ronnevik is the author of Ragged: Spiritual Disciplines for the Spiritually Exhausted and cohost of the Freely Given podcast.
The post What Does It Mean to Be a Bible-Centric Family? appeared first on Christianity Today.
